Growing up and slowly realizing we don’t have to fight the flow of life can be extremely refreshing and revitalizing, although at the same time it can feel very disorienting, especially when we start to perceive just how much energy we’ve been directing towards fantasies and illusions. It can be embarrassing when we find ourselves in a position in which it seems we have to start from completely fresh, as if everything we’ve done so far has been for nothing. As disturbing as such a feeling can be, we should learn to use that anxiety to guide our lives in the right direction. Just the fact that we have enough awareness of ourselves to understand that we’ve wasted our time is a great sign that we’re starting to actually do things right, because the only real benefit to be gained from making mistakes can only be attained when we actually spend time learning from our mistakes, and then implementing that learning into our lives, so we don’t make the same kind of mistakes in the future. If you know you’ve wasted a bunch of your life, then at least now you know you can do something completely different. If you can analyze your life up to this point in time and realize that you’re not headed in the direction you’d like, then there’s no better time than now to start heading in a different direction. This doesn’t mean that all damage is irreversible, and this is far from the case. Although it’s true that it’s never too late to change within one’s own heart, too often we can never escape the guilt of what we’ve done in the past, even when we’ve learned from those mistakes and learned to live better from that learning. The people we’ve wronged in the past are not obligated to forgive us and once we have harmed them, but at least within our own hearts, we should know that we can change, and we should actively try to change, even if no one from our past will ever know it. Like I said, when you question your entire existence and everything you’ve done and all you’ve been until now, don’t despair. You are finally seeing things clearly, so take it as a sign that an immediate change is needed, and look within yourself for the necessary steps towards change. Although the journey forward may seem rough and long, even nearly impossible, we have to know that it’s all up to us. It’s either now or never, and no one out there is coming to our rescue. Our lives are entirely up to each and every one of us, and we should embrace the fact that we had problems we’ve acknowledged and are willing to work on. After all, life presents us with all sorts of challenges from the day we are born, and it’s the constant process of overcoming challenges and learning and repeating that keeps us moving forward as a species, even through all the pain and uncertainty.
I appreciate you reading.
rebel eye 