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DAY 32 (1000 WORDS, 3rd attempt)

We are who we are. Just like the world and its inhabitants are all so different, just as there are so many different viewpoints, ideas and beliefs, cultures and traditions, which make up the world we live in, there are also many elements which make us who we are. Each person is a world within his or her self, with many different sides, some of which they may never show the world. We are a product of our environment, yes, of the way we were raised, of all the people we have known and interacted with throughout our lives. Every second changes us, every idea is taken into our consciousness but it is also imprinted into our subconscious mind in some form or another. We are also who we are because of our genes, and maybe we all behave in certain ways because of our shared collective past as part of mankind. Maybe we might even carry something over from some past incarnations, if reincarnation is indeed real. We are all aware of the complexities of the human mind, we recognize this within ourselves, yet it seems like we often forget this when it comes to other people. We see only what we are shown, or only what we want to see, but we forget that usually there is much more than meets the eye. We are born, we live to the best of our abilities, and for what? Some of us are afraid of trying to find out, while others spend their entire lives trying to find that ultimate meaning. We often take pride in being part of a specific group, but we don’t realize that one group is not big enough to fully describe what all of its members really are, only a small part of that. We become entangled in ideologies and make ourselves believe things beyond any doubt, when we really should be humble and understand that we can’t even fully know ourselves. Even with an entire long lifetime, there will probably be things about ourselves which we’ll only understand when we reach a certain age, as well as things which we’ll never fully understand. Life is too complex to make sense of, to apply one ideology to it and to base all of our decisions only on that. We are also extremely complex, and we are impossible to fit into one box, one label. We might feel some way about something now, but as we learn or as we experience more of life, we might come to a different understanding, and this is why we should always be humble and open to learn. Belief might provide us with comfort, but it is often the end of learning, since we choose to close ourselves off from anything that might go against our beliefs. I get it, as I said, life is hard to make sense of, maybe even impossible, and it’s a relief to feel like we’ve found an answer, something to help us get by with a feeling of being in control. I’ve never been able to believe in anything to the point of having absolutely no doubt, because I know that life is unexpected and mysterious, and I know that the more I learn, the more I realize how little I know. Who am I to pretend like I have it all figured out, when I’m just one person living one life, among billions of other people who inhabit the world at any given moment? What about all of their life experiences, their thoughts and feelings? I’m sure that many of the conclusions others have come to from their own experiences are probably completely opposite of what I think I’ve realized in my twenty-something years on this earth, and that’s okay, that’s the way it should be. The beauty of life is trying to understand others, to connect with them, to share what we can and to receive what we can so that we may come to some sort of mutual understanding. In the same way, all of the elements within ourselves can lead us to many different conclusions about life, but if none of them are constant, then are we really the same person at all times? I am no longer who I was ten years ago, or even yesterday, and I’ll probably be much different many years from now. Life is a constant learning journey, and learning from others can help us understand ourselves. We can see the similarities in our differences. The Greeks had the concept of the world as a Mother, Mother Gaia, and although these days we use the earth for our own monetary gain, because of greed, it could possible that the earth is a sentient being, maybe every planet and galaxy is alive. Just like little microscopic bacteria live on us and all around us, and they probably see us as a huge landscape to walk on, to live on, perhaps we can’t see this planet earth for what it truly is because we are so small. Even though we are physically small, we are connected to the entire universe, and our spirit is immortal, the same thing that keeps me alive is what keeps you alive. We breathe the same air, the same air that humans breathed thousands of years ago, we are all connected by invisible bonds. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by such complexity, and I’m not exactly sure what to make of it, what to do with it all. Then I remember that this is the beauty of life, observing, learning, understanding, not understanding, putting pieces together, taking them back apart, making mistakes and growing from them, failing and feeling the motivation to succeed. In this age of materialism, I really think it would do the world much good if we would all look within, if we could all stop trying to associate with groups and ideologies, and instead look within ourselves and ask ourselves who and what we are. I think if we looked deeply and honestly, we would find a lot of good within ourselves, and this would inspire us greatly to connect with others, to do something great in the world, not in terms of amassing wealth, but in terms of creating genuine connections with others, in terms of being there for those who need us, being overall more attentive to the world around us.

much love

~ rebel eye

DAY 30 (1000 WORDS, 3rd attempt)

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One of the first books I ever read which inspired me greatly was Jack Kerouac’s “On The Road.” I don’t remember how exactly I decided to read that book, but by the time I finished reading it I was determined to one day travel the world and find whatever was waiting for me far, far away from home. I guess I ended up reading On The Road because I was always fascinated with hippie culture and history, which eventually lead me to look into the beat generation and their literature. I’ve always sensed that something is off in society, and it felt really cool to learn about a group of people who one day challenged the standard way in which society worked, taking a stand against materialism and war, and embracing spirituality and community, living with presence rather than for money and success. As I’ve grown up, I’ve come to realize that I probably romanticized the whole thing way too much, and that, although their hearts were in the right place, it takes a lot more than non-conformity to actually make a positive change in the world. This doesn’t change the fact that I still feel like a hippie at heart. I’ve always thought that living life on one’s own terms, staying true to oneself, is what really matters in life, far more than success or wealth. Today it doesn’t seem like most people would agree. Most people are trying to chase dollars, to accumulate as much money as they can, living in fear of being left behind, of never having enough, of not having anything to pass down to their future generations. It seemed amazing to me, to read about Dean and Sal’s adventures as they made their way through the United States, hitchhiking, drinking and meeting new people. I wanted that so bad. They weren’t worried about the future, they were ecstatic about the now and going wherever life took them. I’ve always admired that a lot, having the courage to face the unknown and to really embrace whatever life has to offer us wherever we may go. I also have always been super interested in strange things, everything weird from mysticism to psychedelics, and basically drugs in general. I guess what both mysticism and drugs have in common are altered states of consciousness. I know there wasn’t much of that on On The Road, but that was even better because these guys were actually enjoying life sober, just high off life itself, apart from some beers here and there. Actually, now that I think about it there was probably more alcohol than I remember. I always wanted to live like that, and I’m a bit sad to say that my dreams of adventure haven’t really come true. I don’t mean to blame the world, but the fact is that the idea I had of the world when I was a kid doesn’t really match what I started noticing as I became older. The world now seems like a cold and heartless place, and it gets worse as time goes by because we are all becoming more isolated and divided. Rather than coming together and bonding over our shared consciousness as human beings, we close ourselves off from others because of things such as politics and religion. In a way I guess my dreams have come true. I travelled back to Honduras, my home country, and I met my wife Maria there, as well as some great new friends. I guess I just expected more adventure, more running around from here to there, more of a hippie life. Maybe I did get the hippie life I wanted, but it just wasn’t what I thought it would be. I did party a lot with a lot of people, using all kinds of substances, I had a lot of laughs over the years, but it seems like a lot of it was just super shallow, like there was no substance. Perhaps I was expecting too much, I expected philosophy, to find a deep meaning in everything, and instead I noticed how people are mainly focused on their day to day activities or on “making it” in some form or another. I don’t know if things have always been like this, but I suspect that the more we merge with technology, the more we advance technologically, the farther away we seem to step from trying to find any deep meaning in life, or even thinking about it. Maybe we all think about life and its meaning, but maybe we’re all too afraid to discuss these things with others, so we choose to engage in small talk instead. I realize that, over the years, as I started feeling like life wasn’t really like the idea of life that I had in my mind, I started closing myself off from life and people in general, and I wonder if this is what happens to many of us. Children are magic, they’re full of dreams and passion, they’re excited for life, they don’t need any external stimuli. They say what they think without fear of ridicule. It’s only when we start growing up that we start to see how the world works, and it feels like dreaming will keep us from functioning and succeeding in society. Maybe this makes us close ourselves off from others, further amplifying the feeling that the world is a cold and lonely place. I don’t really know, I’m just trying to make sense of it. I have to be grateful for my life though. I haven’t travelled all over the world as I wanted to, but at least I got to immerse myself in my own culture again, which I had left behind at the age of nine when my parents moved to Canada, and I even met my amazing wife there which I wouldn’t change for anything in the world. I also travelled to Brazil, where I met some family from my dad’s side, and I also met a lot of cool people there and partied in some beautiful beaches. I love travelling to places and immersing myself in the culture, and living there for a good while. For now I’m just focused on establishing some solid ground to stand on, trying to finally make something happen with my music, while I’m in Canada, but I really can’t wait for another adventure, to travel somewhere else and feel like I’m on the move again. I guess I’ll always be a hippie at heart.

much love

~ rebel eye

DAY 24 (1000 WORDS, 3rd attempt)

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I love to learn many things, and throughout my life I’ve been inspired to learn from many experiences and circumstances. It’s because of my ideas and decisions that I find myself in the place where I stand today. People, in general, express themselves in different ways, depending on their own life experiences, but who can know for certain, to the point of being able to advise others, what the right way to live life is, who can know what is the right thing to choose at any given moment in life. It’s easy to look at others’ mistakes or faults, from the outside, but it might not be as easy for them to notice these issues themselves. For example, the other day I was walking with my wife and I noticed that a little leaf had ended up on her hair somehow. She had probably been walking with it on her head for a while now, but since it was on the opposite side of where I was walking I didn’t notice it at first. However, as soon as I turned for some reason and looked at her straight on I noticed it right away and removed it. Of course, it’s not a big deal, nothing would happen if she would have just kept walking with the leaf on her head, but that’s not the point. The point is that it made me think, it made me realize that perhaps there’s things that we don’t notice about ourselves, yet might be easy for others to notice. Your hear is on your head, so it’s impossible to see it, at least the part of it that doesn’t slide down your face. Of course, my hair is my hair, so I should be more familiar with it than anyone else, yet for some reason, precisely because it’s mine, I can’t see a good part of it, while others easily can. In fact, I can never look directly at my own face, I can only see a reflection of myself in the mirror. Everyone else can see my real face though, even though it’s my face. If I have something on my face or hair, someone who looks at me can remove it, but it’s difficult for me to see whatever’s on myself. You might be familiar with the Bible quote “First, remove the beam out of your own eye, and then you can see clearly to remove the speck out of your brother’s eye.” I love quotes like this, quotes that provide general wisdom on how to grow as human beings, because most of the time we make changes in our life depending on the situations we are facing, and even though we can’t know for sure what the right decision is at any given moment, if we are armed with real wisdom then we have less chance of making the wrong decision. We are always wondering what is the right way to navigate life, how can we become better? We often have doubts and insecurities that lead us to anxiety and indecision. That can be a problem, yes, but in reality, it comes down to how we look at things. Our indecision is a chance for us to analyze the situation further, maybe to seek advice from others who can relate to our situation. If someone has a suggestion for us, we should humbly listen. As long as we understand that we are in control of our lives, we have no reason to be afraid of any words that may come to us from anyone. On the contrary, we never know if a perfect stranger could be the messenger we needed in order to finally understand something we’ve been indecisive about for so long. We should humbly listen to advice, then analyze it to the best of our abilities, and finally make a decision. I’ve received lots of great pieces of advice throughout my life, some of which I have saved into the book of my memory, and some which I have unfortunately discarded and thrown into the trash. I probably could have saved myself some trouble if I had listened to some of those that I discarded, but changes can be both good and bad in the end, in the sense that, one can learn even from the worst mistakes, in the end it’s all up to you. Again, as I mentioned at the beginning of this post, I can not guarantee that any way of life is the right way, I can only share my own experiences, and I know that when things seem completely hopeless, usually that’s when we can dig deep into ourselves and find truth, find what we’re truly made of, we can reflect, we can get to truly know ourselves and grow, and eventually we can bounce back stronger than ever. The thing I wrote about how it’s easier to see someone else’s mistakes, and then the quote I posted about removing the beam from your own eye before removing it from others’ seem to be a bit contradictory, but so is life. We might be faced with a situation where we can easily remove someone’s obstacles for them, but is that always the right thing to do? Do we always know what’s best for others? Could we be doing them a disservice by preventing them from living their own lives and overcoming their own obstacles? Just as I said we should listen humbly to advice, we should also be as humble as we can when providing advice, we should not force others to follow in our footsteps, because even though we may have learned a specific lesson from our own life experience, we may not know everything that someone else has lived through, that has brought them to their own current experience, so we might not really be helping them as much as we think we are. Should we do all of our kids’ homework, for example, so that they will never learn anything? Should we shelter them from the evils of life, so that they will be paralyzed when shit finally does hit the fan? No, we should provide our humble advice, not in order to manipulate, just so that we can share what we know. From then on, it’s up to them, and if they’ve learned to listen to advice in a humble manner and then analyze it, rather than instantly rejecting anything that may contradict their beliefs, then maybe they might end up actually making a right decision, a right decision influenced by you, because you shared with love and not with force.

much love

~ rebel eye

DAY 10 (1000 WORDS, 3rd attempt)

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DAY 10, nice! Only have to do ten days nine more times to get to a hundred. My record right now is 81 days straight, if I’m not mistaken. This time I don’t only plan to beat that, I plan to go for as long as I can, until the end of my days if possible. Consistency is the key to improvement, and when paired with a constant flow of new knowledge it can really make things happen. It’s always a struggle, trying to find a way of keeping myself constantly reminded of this, even during days when I’m the most tired or just not feeling up to much, I’d love to have a way of just snapping back into the right mindset to get back to work, to get back into the flow of things. Usually if I miss a day of something I’ve decided to do daily, it completely kills my motivation to do it, because I know I have to get back to that point again, if I’ve done it before I can do it again but it’s gonna take me a while to get there so I may as well not even start. It’s a stupid logic, I know, and it’s the main reason why I didn’t post on here at all for 2 years after my Day 81 post in August of 2019. I mentioned all of this in a recent post, but it’s cool for me to recap since today is day 10 so it definitely feels like an important milestone. A lot is going on apart from the resurrection of my blog, mainly with my music! Music is perhaps my biggest passion, and today I posted my first beat for sale on Beatstars, something I should probably have done years ago. I always had the idea of eventually rapping on my own beats, but it’s clear that I can’t come up with enough rhymes fast enough to fill up all the beats I produce. Ultimately my goal is to live off my music, or off of any of my creative pursuits, but preferably music, so it doesn’t matter in the end whether I make money as a rapper or as a producer. I can even rap just for fun for the small group of people who do listen to me, and it won’t matter too much because I’ll be having fun making beats and making money that way. This is what I’ve recently decided, so I’ll be uploading daily beats on Beatstars, as well as accompanying videos for each beat on YouTube and Instagram, and just like this daily blog post session, I hope to be posting consecutive beats for as long as God blesses me with life. One of the biggest obstacles in my life has been that of the nine-to-five lifestyle, working soul-sucking jobs that don’t interest me in the least as a creative person, doing the bare minimum since I know a sincere and honest work ethic is not necessarily valued, but rather exploited most times, and the overall depression that comes along with this type of life, having little to no time to do what I love. Recently, during the past few years, I’ve been making my own time for myself, but not to slack off like back in the days. Sometimes I’m filled with anxiety these days even, because I feel like I absolutely have to make it with this music thing, or with some other creative pursuit, maybe like writing, if I want to be free of this lifestyle. I don’t mean to complain, I’m honestly grateful for all of my life experiences, and this type of life has taught me the importance of chasing my dreams, that the power to make anything happen is in my hands. I pray to God to help me find the right way to keep motivated and to keep putting the work in consistently. I also have to start reaching out to artists and trying to network, but this is good since it’ll sharpen up my sales skills which I haven’t really used since back when I had some other nine to five jobs.

So yeah, I’m super excited to be getting into this new chapter of my life, where I’m trying to move forward with my passion first and leaving partying and wasting time behind. To be honest I haven’t even been partying for many years now, having realized the pointlessness and stupidity of the constant party lifestyle, but I can’t say I haven’t been wasting time. A lot of it has been due to indecision, and as you may know if you’ve read some of my other recent posts, I think it may have something to do with me being constantly stoned, so I’m starting a really serious goal to stop getting baked as much, and it’s definitely allowing me to see things in a much clearer way to allow me to do what needs to be done to start marketing my business ideas. Yeah, it’s true that bud helps me get creative ideas flowing, there’s no debating that, but sometimes with so many ideas comes indecision, when what we might need at the moment is extreme focus on one specific idea, in order to get started with the execution of that idea. Everything in life has its right time, and I feel like things are starting to align in my life. Only time will tell if I stay motivated enough to constantly continue with my ideas, such as this daily blog post of a thousand words, or the daily beat I’ll be posting, but I really think I will. I really feel like this time is different than ever before, and I truly can’t wait to be writing to you all soon confirming that to be the case. To anyone who struggles with indecision, my advice is to simply get started. Start putting your ideas together, and once you do start putting them out into the world. If you have good content, and you are constantly learning and improving, and constantly showcasing that improvement, then you are applying the formula for success and it is highly unlikely for you to fail. Once again, consistency is key. Knowledge is power. Practice makes perfect. Learn as much as possible about what you do, nowadays there’s so many resources out there. Keep on learning, keep on applying your knowledge in order to practice, showcase your practice and your progress to inspire others!

much love

~ rebel eye

DAY 9 (1000 WORDS, 3rd attempt)

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One day away from day 10, nice! In a way I’d say it feels a bit therapeutic even, writing these thousand words daily, I really think more people ought to try it, at least once in a while if daily’s too much. To be honest I think daily might even be too much for me, but I love the challenge and I’m glad to be taking it on, since I feel like there’s too much shit on my mind, feel like I need to declutter my mental space. It’s nice living life as an observer, and writing down my thoughts and ideas helps me keep organized and on track about what I’m doing. If you’re reading I also appreciate you, it definitely adds another dimension to my mission, it feels like I’ll grow my audience depending on how real I can keep it, how much raw reality I can express in my words, how much of my message I’m truly able to convey. Writing is simple, yet it’s a skill one can always improve on, there are no limits to imagination and creativity, to the combinations of words one can form, and the meanings different people derive from those groups of words, which we might call phrases or sentences. Maybe I can inspire someone to write what’s on their mind as well, and whatever they write could inspire someone else, sparking a chain reaction of inspiration. It’s the invisible things life these which inspire me to write, things I might never notice. So many things have inspired me, things I’ve read I mean, without the author knowing I’ve been inspired. We can’t know whether everything we write is correct in every sense, but if our heart is in the right place then we should have nothing to worry about. Expressing our honest opinions on certain topics can maybe open up the door for much-needed conversation about it, sometimes problems can’t be solved just because there’s simply no dialogue to come to an agreement, so hatred and violence continue to grow. Communication is the key to moving forwards as human beings. Assuming we understand when we really know nothing about something is bound to lead to problems if we ever interact with others who truly do understand. This is the reason why nowadays I spend most of my time watching tutorials, learning the ins and outs of the craft I’ve decided to pursue, now that I finally decided that’s what I want to do for sure. I’ve realized that there’s nothing quite like being prepared, and knowing even more than the necessary just for doing what needs to be done. Things that stand out have to be done with passion, yes, but they also need to be done in the right way, and a lot of times being too passionate at the beginning might result in us starting to soon, and starting off wrong. There’s no such thing as starting too soon, as long as we are prepared, but if we started off wrong then maybe we may as well not have started off at all! So the best scenario is to start off early but to be prepared, and if you didn’t start off as early as you wish you had, don’t get desperate – take the time to learn properly and then get started, now that you have a clear vision of what it is you intend to do, which is what you lacked back then, and the reason why you never got around to doing it earlier. Leaning is the key to life, and to every aspect of it. Hands-on learning is extremely effective, but usually this goes along with learning from someone else, someone who is already very skilled at whatever we are learning, and who is willing to pass that knowledge on to us. We learn by receiving ideas from others, who communicate these ideas from us. Every word I’m using in this post is an idea in itself, and when paired with the words around it, can convey a very different idea than it would on its own. That’s not always the case, but it’s a possibility. Over time, figures of speech become accepted as things everyone says and understands, and as our ideas shape our language over time, so does our language eventually shape our ideas. It’s all a cycle; art – or literature – imitates life, and life imitates art, one reflects the other, back and forth, back and forth. There’s not even a need to specify, to differentiate between art and literature, since great literature could possibly be the highest form of art, effectively transmitting powerful ideas to another, or transmitting powerful emotions through the stories of the character. One Piece is a show that does this in an amazing fashion. I’m not really a huge anime fan, since most animes just don’t have what One Piece has, but One Piece has been my favorite show since I was a little kid in the third grade, I’d wake up at 3:30 am to watch it when it came on at 4am on 4Kids, Sanji’s cigarette was replaced by a lollipop. The point is, I got up super early to watch it because I was intrigued by the story and the characters, by their emotions and the dilemmas they faced. They were emotional and complex yet realistic, or at least relatable. I’d recommend this show to anyone, I’ve even got my mom into it! If I ever complete a novel or any work of fiction, something which I’m actually already working on by the way, that’s what I aspire for, for it to be as moving as One Piece, for it to evoke feelings in the viewer in that exact way. That’s ultimately what I hope to do with the lyrics for my songs as well, I despise mainstream rap because the lyrics are fake and uninspiring, promoting materialism and stupidity. The type of hip-hop that moves me is songs like 2Pac’s “Brenda’s Got a Baby,” a story about a young girl who dies to soon after becoming trapped in the lifestyle of a sex worker, or Flipsyde’s emotional “Happy Birthday,” a track he raps about a child who was aborted because they were not ready to be a family, and the emotions that go along with such a situation. We need more inspiration, people are drowning in worthless pleasure, numbing themselves from an inner feeling that something is wrong, because there’ simply no inspiration. Speak up if you think you have something to say, you never know who you might inspire, and just what might come of it.

much love

~ rebel eye

“Instrumental Inspiration” Volume 1

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I’ve been making beats for basically as long as I’ve been rapping, about 10 years now, and one of my favorite things to do to create chill jazzy beats at times is to sample old records. Back in 2012 I released a few mixtapes where I was rapping over those chill, jazzy kind of beats, and honestly it’s some of my favorite music of mine up until today, and I feel like those beats brought the best out of me as a writer, and even as a rapper, since I flow more naturally on those beats anyway.

I’ve always wanted to rap over my own instrumentals but most of my best ones are electronic, synth-heavy beats, and I’ve always preferred rapping over smooth, soulful sampled rap beats, which I never really felt like I perfected… maybe until recently. The beats on this beat tape, Instrumental Inspiration Volume 1, are some of my earliest sampling experiments, from way back in 2012, so right at the start of my music career. I never rapped over these beats, and they’re much simpler in structure and sound than the chopped-up, multilayered sampled beats I’m creating nowadays on my MPC. These are usually just repeating a loop that I liked off a track, and adding some drums and other sounds on them.

I feel as if I finally might have what it takes to create some kinds of those beats for myself, those chill kinds of beats which I feel at home on. I’ll be releasing all my sampled beats under the Instrumental Inspiration series from now on, and the first few volumes will consist of my older beats, like these ones, and then I’ll be moving on to the newer ones. I still felt like these beats needed to be released. They’re chill, and also dope in their own simplistic kind of way. They’re also nostalgic to me of the time when I mainly made beats in FL Studio, nowadays I feel like I’m having much more fun on the MPC, and it’s a whole different feeling, creative-wise. Anyway, here’s the collection of my 11 earliest sampled beats. A lot them are remakes of some iconic rap beats, like Many Men, Dead Presidents, Juicy, etc.

Stream or download the full beat tape here:

https://rebeleyemusic.bandcamp.com/album/instrumental-inspiration-vol-1

LISTEN TO MY MUSIC:

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/561X5APMrh7xWyWrLgKbhq

Hyperfollow: https://hyperfollow.com/RebelEyeMusic

Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/rebel-eye/1620644399

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/rebeleyemusic

Bandcamp: https://rebeleyemusic.bandcamp.com/

YouTube (Main): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKyA8zKq1i8_061HyejFFVw

YouTube (Mixtapes & Remixes): https://www.youtube.com/user/YoungRicoMusic

FOLLOW ME & CONTACT ME:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RebelEyeMusic/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/officialrebelrico/

Blog: https://www.ejsade.com

e-mail: officialrebelspirit@gmail.com

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We’re All Weird… and We’re Not

There’s an entire universe within us. We are connected to mysterious forces which we can’t perceive or understand, but which control the way we behave, the way we live our lives. Where do our thoughts come from? What is the origin of the ideas that catch our attention, sometimes even become obsessions? Where do our deepest dreams and desires arise from? So many questions to ask, so many mysteries to ponder. All we can do is live and learn. Life is weird, in every sense of the word. It’s so hard to make sense of, yet it feels like there’s some meaning behind it all, some reason to move forward despite, or even because of, all the suffering and pain. We all feel like the main character in a movie that is our life, and just like in the movies, we have to accept that life will have its conflicts. These are obstacles in the way of our dreams because life is a duality. These obstacles are ours to own, to face and to deal with, to overcome and to learn from. When we successfully rise above the challenges life throws at us is when we truly grow as human beings. So how can we properly face the challenges of everyday life? What if we fail to properly face these problems? We can’t face them if we don’t know who we are, if we are not at peace with ourselves, if we are trying to run from the truth. So the first step in our journey is to get to know ourselves, and to come to terms with whatever we find to be true about ourselves.

Just like life is weird, we are all weird. We are all different, special in our own unique ways, just like we all have different challenges to face. Often times we have exactly what we need within us to overcome the challenges life has placed in our way, yet we fail to realize this. We fail because we can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, we see only misery and injustice, we wonder why we struggle, why us, why not someone else. We wonder how we can move forward with our deepest dreams if we are stuck in these everyday struggles, if we seem to be paralyzed by the smallest of inconveniences. We wish we could be rid of all challenges, and then everything would be perfect, we would be free to make our vision a reality. We see all sorts of people living seemingly happy lives, and we wonder why that can’t be us. We fail to realize that our life is our own life, our struggles are our own, we have the solutions to our own problems within us, and we will find our own peace once we have done what we need to do, once we have understood the truth about why we are suffering, once we have accepted ourselves with all our flaws and imperfections, all the mistakes we’ve made in the past, and all that we wish we already were but still haven’t become. We still have time to grow, but only if we learn from our mistakes, if we accept and forgive all that we are and have been; only then can we truly move forward in peace, to find real growth at the other end.

If we don’t accept ourselves as we are, if we don’t fully forgive ourselves for our past mistakes, then we lose the power we would otherwise have over the challenges we face. We start trying to copy others, to look at what others are doing in order to try to find some relief, some sense of belonging, of understanding and satisfaction, of feeling like we’re part of a bigger whole. What we really need to be doing is owning our challenges and our struggles, and looking within, with the conviction that we are sure to find the tools we need in order to overcome the current challenge as well as any other that life may throw at us. We need to understand that we are enough, that the power of life is flowing in our veins, in our breath, all of this keeps that us alive; it is not our decision to be alive at this moment, it is a gift, and it isn’t forever, as we all know. So let’s fully own our lives and see what comes of it. Just like we love to celebrate when things go right, we need to learn how to learn from our mistakes, how to learn from the pain and sorrow that may come from those mistakes, and how to learn from life even when our pain isn’t justified. We need to learn how to not grow bitter and cold when life doesn’t go our way. Life can be crazy and cruel, I know, and for a long time I was complaining about life’s injustices all the time, about the system, to everyone around me, until I realized that it does nothing more than create more negative energy. Negative energy messes with the complainer as well as with all those around them, not to mention how everything is energy, even the words we speak never die, whether positive or negative. We are what we focus on.

So focus on you. Focus on truly being yourself, to the best of your ability, on being all you can be, on shining a light of positivity however small you may feel it is. Embrace your weirdness, if you wanna call it that, and shine your light in whatever way you can. At the end of the day, we’re all weird, and at the same time we’re not. See, being weird would imply different from the rest, different than normal. What really is normal though? We’re all weird to someone (and they’re probably weird to us), to whole groups of people even, so in truth we’re all weird. Although, if we’re all weird then it isn’t so weird to be weird after all, I guess.

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1,000 WORDS (2nd attempt): DAY 74: “The Trouble Is You Think You Have Time.”

Jack Kornfield said that “the trouble is you think you have time.” We all think we have enough time. We know that there are important things which have never been said up to this point, things which probably should have been done a long time ago. We know that we have to set things straight when it comes to a certain person or situation, that we have to confess the truth to them, but we are sure that doing so will result in a loss of pleasure to us, so we choose to hold on to a comfortable lie instead. Often times when we hurt others, we immediately realize, we come to know that we are in the wrong, yet we create the dumbest excuse to go on feeling offended and entitled, instead of owning up to our mistakes and apologizing. We are too scared to be vulnerable, too afraid of our own feelings to ever be able to analyze them properly, let alone those of others. We cannot apologize sincerely since we see it as a sign of weakness, of admitting that we are wrong, and therefore inferior somehow to the other person. Too many of us have killed our own inner child. We are afraid to live because we are scared to death of being less, being seen as less, of being seen as weak in this hostile world, of opening up to others and forming true connections. We have become so immersed in one thing or one kind of lifestyle, on our numerous distractions from our problems, that we fail to see the blessings all around us, and we fail to take action when it comes to things we know we should do or not do, things which we ignore for a while hoping they will go away. Soon enough we realize this approach just doesn’t work. Nothing ever goes away, we simply cannot run from ourselves, from the things that still haunt us, from the inner issues we need to resolve, as well as all the external ones. Owning up to his or her own mistakes is really a nightmare to someone who has adopted a victim mentality towards life and who has created the habit of complaining about the smallest misfortune, but to one who is connected to the deeper truths of life and what it means to be alive, this shouldn’t be a problem. When we are honest with ourselves and others, but especially with ourselves, about where we are going wrong, where we are doing the right thing and where we’re not, then we are truly starting our journey into self-developing. Nevertheless, it is only the start. Sometimes we can be brutally honest with ourselves about our shortcomings and errors, but due to our negative perspective which is so attached to physical reality we cannot make the necessary changes in order to truly resolve these issues. We let them linger on in our lives, affecting every new relationship or project, affecting all the thoughts that run through our minds every single day. We do not know how to tackle them, but since we think we have time, we do not even try, we just look the other way, we look for all kinds of distractions, hoping that we will eventually forget about the deepest truths of our lives. We cannot live in this way, fueled by ignorance and fear. We must understand and live by the fact that everything is cyclical and recurring, that there are patterns woven throughout the webs of history which connect the dots of human interaction in the most magical ways, completely unknown to our limited perceptions, and that the time to act is now, that we were born where and when we born to do things, to make our lives worth living and to fill them with meaning. We understand that all pain and pleasure will pass, and this is a constant reminder to us not to fall into desperation. Better days are ahead, but for now, there is simply no time to waste when it comes to the truly important things. Tell your mom and dad you love them today, make plans to spend more time with your siblings or with your friends you haven’t seen in a while. Get outside and meet new people, experience new cultures, don’t just spend the day looking at the same old screen inside the same stuffy room. Live! Get up and live! Lively yourself up, or “lively up yourself!” As the man Bob Marley would say. The world is devoid of honesty nowadays. We have all become addicted to our way of living and are afraid to give it up. We have adopted mainstream society’s shallow values, and if we haven’t, then at least we have learned how to pretend that we have. We have hardened our hearts and become cold to the love which is present within us all and which connects us on a spiritual level, on the deepest level of connection, if we would only choose to stop for a moment and pay attention to the now. Stop seeing others as separate from yourself and simply say what needs to be said. Stop seeing the future as a separate reality in which you will play a part. Your life could end at any second. Understand that the time to do what must be done is now. Do what you must do, and you will feel much better after! You will feel more confident for having spoken your mind, you will feel like a more open person, you will receive more respect and will be able to communicate clearly with the world. You will feel accomplished, and will be ready to take on an even more challenging task. You will be building your stamina and strength, your self-control and willpower. Don’t waste time. Don’t think that you will be able to do something only after you have done something else or become someone better. The time to take action is now. There will never be another time, since every moment is really Now. Tomorrow might never come and we might not wake from our dreams tonight. Life is uncertain, and things seem to happen randomly, but everything has deep significance. Have you thought about where you stand in this wonderful world, in the grand scheme of things, about who you are in this life? If not, then the time to start pondering these questions is now!

To be continued tomorrow, on Day 75.

~ Rebel Spirit

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1,000 WORDS (2nd attempt): DAY 70: The Mysteries of Life and Writing.

70 days into this writing goal, every day writing a thousand words and posting them on here. I’m not sure of what my purpose for this goal actually is, but I’m glad it’s become a daily habit to write. I wish I enjoyed it more though, since sometimes it seems like just one more goal I have to complete before midnight. I think what might be missing still is organization. I have to find a way to organize my ideas, and to plan certain days to write about certain ideas. So far I’ve just been randomly writing every day, going off whatever comes to mind when I sit down to write. I have a feeling that, maybe if I just write enough, maybe if I write consistently, every day, eventually I might create a masterpiece, something which people might read and really feel inspired. I feel so much significance in life, things connect in my head and I am in awe at the way in which life interacts with life. Over the past few years it’s become really overwhelming, so I’ve started to try to get things written down, but for some reason so many things which I want to express are hard to get into words. I guess it’s expected when one is constantly learning about spirituality and philosophy, but I hope I can start to get my ideas across a bit clearer soon. The most important idea that I want to get across to people is that, even if we don’t know the answers to all of life’s mysteries, even if we feel that life is meaningless at times, or worse, that it’s evil and cruel, we are only a part of life, each one of us, so we are in no position to decipher what everything in life means. Do you consider yourself evil? No? What about perfect and good in every way? That’s not you either right? We are all making up life, life includes us, so we can’t separate ourselves from it in order to ever examine it properly. Life is what happens to us every day, but life is also everything that happens without us, far away from us, every single day. Since we are not God, and we are not the creators of life, we must assume a position of humility. Too many of us associate humility with weakness, with being soft and allowing others to walk all over us. Humility is an attitude towards life. Someone who is humble has no need to justify his or her belief or to have others believe it. We can all use our sense of discernment to find what works best for us in our lives, what is right and what is wrong conduct, but humility means that we shouldn’t attempt to force others to live as we do. We can offer wise advice when we see our friends and family struggling, but we must understand that we are all free to live the life we have been blessed with. The reason I want to get this message across through my writing is because, once we understand this, that we are interconnected with life and that it is much deeper than it often seems, then we will be more likely to try to come to a fuller understanding of it. The person who, in his or her arrogance, thinks that his belief system is all there is to know, and that he has figured it all out, that life can be fully explained by any one religion or philosophy, has closed himself off from ever reaching higher truth. Humility is the first step towards properly living life. Once we assume a humble attitude towards life, then we are free to live, to interact, to understand. This is why I write, because, even though I do not have all the answers to life, at least I accept and understand that. I can write without pretending to have it all figured out, as a real person with real thoughts, trying to live a real life. I don’t know what will happen with my writing. I don’t know who will read it, or why, or what thoughts will pop into each reader’s mind as they read this, but I write because I know that life is made of connections, and that we must do what we have to do, even as we face uncertainty. Should I stop writing because I don’t know what will ultimately come of it, or even why I’m doing it at times? Of course not. We have to keep on moving in the face of uncertainty, and we have to keep on learning, on wondering, on connecting the dots of life, even if we are facing adversity, even if it seems like it isn’t worth moving on. Life is mysterious, and knowing that, really feeling that mysterious quality of life within myself, all the unknown potential which lies within every human being, has really sparked a flame in me, to read, to write, to share information so that whoever may read it may be inspired in some positive way. I started out this post with no idea of what I would write, and I even started writing my own answers to my own question down. Why don’t I enjoy writing more? I answered that I had to have more organization. However, once I got to writing I had more and more ideas, and now I’m not sure how I even ended up on this sentence, writing about what I’m currently writing about, about how life is so wonderful and mysterious. The point is that it just happened somehow, that something real which was on my mind was successfully transmitted into words for you all, and that now there’s no going back, all because I decided to just give it a go. Things are bound to happen in life, no matter what, and if we try to live with humility, we can try to understand and learn more about the things that happen in life and why, and we can learn to use those things in order to have better things happen in the future. Everything’s a mystery, so we might as well try and figure it out. we never know where life will take us, but it is sure to take us somewhere. Stop pretending to know everything, stop pretending that you know where you’re going. Be humble, seek help from those who know, and try to learn and understand, and then to put into practice.

To be continued tomorrow, on Day 71.

~ Rebel Spirit

1,000 WORDS (2nd attempt): DAY 53: From Tired to Inspired.

Today was another day. I’m tired, but I have enough energy to learn, to read, to write. I’m faded, I ate some pizza so I feel a bit heavy, but I’m comfortable. Today I was thinking back on my fam, the ways in which they may have changed while I’ve been gone away, the way things used to be, how they will never be the same again. It’s not a sad thing, maybe nostalgic, but shocking as well. My youngest brother just finished the eleventh grade, only one left now to graduate from high school. Meanwhile I still feel like I just left high school, and I’m like eight years older than him. It’s hard sometimes, not to feel like you’re getting lost in the system, like you’re not really heading anywhere. It’s easy to judge ourselves based on external values, based on what society thinks about life and how it should be. Life is way too often referred to as a general idea. But life, as in the concept of being alive, and life meaning the time that a single individual has before death, are two different things. Life is something common to all, in the first sense, but in the second, life is very, very different to all individuals. We all experience and perceive things much differently than those around us. We might be more similar to some of our worst enemies than to those around us, because we are all born a certain way, and then we are further shaped in a certain way as we grow, and so many of the factors at play are simply out of our control, such as all of childhood before we can take care of ourselves as adolescents or adults. We don’t decide whether we are similar to others or not, in a way, our nature is embedded in us, and our karma is creating our life, so it is our duty, our dharma, to live, each one of us his or her individual life, to the fullest. We all can find more in common than we think we can with almost anyone we can imagine, just as we can find things about most people which are absolutely disgusting to us. We are all alike and yet very different, when we think of it in a context of duality, but beyond this we are similar in Spirit, in a dimension beyond all duality. So again, we shouldn’t judge ourselves based on external values which society believes are important, but instead we should understand that we are already special, that there is already a purpose to each and every one of us, including me, and including you as well. If we are born in the United States, or in Honduras, or Canada, or whether we are Asian or European or Middle Eastern, we are all born exactly where and when we are meant to be born, to the parents who we were meant to be born to. Whether we are meant to be male or female, all we have to do is to look at who are, who we were born as. There is a reason why we are who we are, why I am who I am, and why you are born are you, and he as he is, and she as she is. Everyone comes to life because of each parent’s decision to make love, to have sex. Beyond this, however, there are deeper reasons, reasons which we simply can’t understand, for why a new life is born at a certain time. It is not our place to take a life that God has chosen to bring into this world, especially if it has come about because of our own carelessness, because we want to party and be wild and free, free to exchange our sexual energy with whoever we please, without ever even attempting to understand its true power, or its connection with the divine force which is love, and how they are meant to be fused together in the harmony of a true and loving relationship. We have to face responsibility for our actions, otherwise we will never be truly free. The evil we commit today will haunt generations down the line for a long, long time, just as the sins of our ancestors have left us in the state we are in today. Changes take time, and things all have their effects. We live in a world of cause and effect, there is simply no denying it. Those who choose to live in denial of this basic truth of life are bound to face the consequences of their actions regardless, but these days they try not to be legally held accountable. We must understand that sex is sacred, that any new life is sacred, that a great Spirit lives in all of us, and is what gives life to any body. A body without Spirit would be nothing but meat and bones, just like the chicken or beef most of us eat. How can we ever understand the sanctity of life when we eat other species for mere convenience? I myself still haven’t stopped eating meat, so don’t think of this as an attack to you or anyone else, but we can’t stay in denial of the facts. If we acknowledge the truth, then we are bound to change sooner or later, we will be compelled to change, since the truth will set us free, it has to. If we stay in denial though, why would we ever attempt to change, to improve, if we can’t see what’s wrong in the way we behave? Time flies, life is sacred, and we need to figure out how to live smarter, how to really feel alive and really be alive during every second. I started out a bit tired, now I feel inspired, just like when I read some truth which resonates with me. Reading and writing are amazing tools, I can’t stress it enough, to get to know about thought around the world, through the ages and even now, as well as thoughts floating around up in your own head.

To be continued tomorrow, on Day 54.

~ Rebel Spirit