Sometimes it’s hard to let go of our ego. We talk about it, we say we believe in the Self beyond the ego, yet as soon as temptation comes we fall in its trap, as soon as anger and frustration hit, we are quick to let our wrath unfold upon everything in its path. We lash out at innocent bystanders, we let our frustration get in the way of us performing our tasks correctly at work, or from being fully present for who we live with or spend most of our time with. When frustration is constantly entertained in our minds, we find a feeling arising in us that the world is against us, that there’s an invisible enemy aiming to hold us down, or to bring us down as soon as we make a move towards the top. This attitude, this state of mind, they greatly strengthen the ego as well as our state of separation, not only from others, but from ourselves as well. We are not even fully connected to everything we are doing, to everything going on around us, as we begin to drown in our troubled thoughts. We become immersed in negative thought patterns, in destructive states of mind which we spend more and more time in as the days go by. These mental disturbances alienate us from ourselves and from those who love us. We become defensive, we create a fortress around our personally, around the image we have created for ourselves, since we need it in only to feel like we matter. Our ego feels safe in separation, in our originality, in our brilliance or intelligence, or worse of all, some feel extremely proud of their spiritual progress or status within a community. Spiritual pride is the worse of all, since no one can claim to live a spiritual life if they regard their spiritual learning and activities as their personal strengths, as their personal achievements which need to be celebrated. These people wish to be congratulated for their spiritual success, maybe unconsciously, they might think they are making progress, but the pleasure they feel could really be derived from them beginning to form an image of themselves which is centered around spirituality. This can render a person blind to the facts of life, providing them with a false sense of security. We need to always check ourselves, we need to reflect on our behavior, on our thoughts even more importantly, and we need to be honest with ourselves no matter what conclusions we may come to. If we don’t do this, we cannot rise above our ego. The ego doesn’t need to be done away with, we need to be aware of who we are, what our own name is, etc, if we wish to survive in this world. Maybe we can leave these things behind if we become monks and follow their strict rules, but for most of us reading this, we probably need to go on with our lives, and we cannot afford to completely do away with who we know ourselves to be. This is okay, this is not a problem. Some people try to find an identity in spirituality, to feel special because they live differently than others. This is an entirely erroneous idea, since they are only separating themselves from others. The basic rules of morality need to be mastered by us, as well as basic control over our senses, if we wish to progress on the path of the Spirit. We shouldn’t do it in order to achieve any goal though, this is a path that we walk our whole lives, since it is life itself. Life itself is spiritual, and everything is full of meaning if we wish to see it. We do have a body, we do need to feed it and take care of it, that’s the point of life, to take care of everything we’ve been given. Sadly, too many of us not only do not take proper care of our own bodies, but we actively try to destroy them from within. We smoke too many cigarettes, we drink excessively, we don’t watch where we walk, we get in all sorts of fights, and we live in stress which is also causing sickness within us. Apart from all that we eat mostly garbage and we don’t take enough time to rest, or to truly feel at peace, to pray or to sit for a bit and meditate. We need to exercise and to cut out the toxic things which we put into our bodies, it is natural to have to take care of our bodies, they should not be neglected. Having a body, owning one during this lifetime, if you will, should be taken as the first lesson to learn in life, as it can teach us a great deal when it comes to responsibility. The idea of life is to find balance, to selflessly take care, for ourselves and for others as well, to do it even as we understand that we are alive beyond this dimension, in Spirit, beyond time and space and human understanding. With this firm in mind, we are prevented from becoming attached to the things of the world, even to the things we cherish the most, those which we consider ours, even the people we love. In order to care for them, or for ourselves, correctly we have to learn to let go of our ego, we have to learn to be vulnerable around some people, we’ll have to learn to speak our mind, to always tell people the truth, we’ll have to keep a high standard for ourselves. Attachment arises from ego-driven so-called love, which is more like lust, whether physical or mental. Sometimes we just need someone to prevent us from feeling lonely with ourselves. True love arises when we think about what we can offer others, not about what they can do for us. We must understand that this is more important for us, for the planet and for everyone and everything in it, than our own individual ego, a mere fabrication of our minds, and this will allow us to live life truly free.
To be continued tomorrow, on Day 55.
~ Rebel Spirit